Prayer Required For Others

I know I have been called to be a intercessor in prayer for others.  I have not been doing a good job of it.
Admitting this is somewhat embarrassing , however the truth should always win.  The name and faces of people drop in on me and I feel compelled to pray for them.  I don't always know why.  I feel pain and such empathy for them and that is how I know it is not a mistake that I have be called to pray.  I shrink from petitioning for them because it causes me pain.  Not a good enough reason  not to do what I have been called to do.  Sometimes. when I am released to tell the person I've been praying for them, they will tell me about a difficult time the having and began to feel relief, or will just cry and nod for we both know it was a divine appointment. This kind of sensitivity to the needs of others is divine.
I apologize to all of you that I have let down when I am not on my intercessory assignment. We serve a forgiving God, but I will not continue  to be disobedient for it is not good for those I should be lifting up
before the Lord and certainly, not good for me.

Waiting on the Lord

I haven't had a job since July of 2012.  My husband got laid off in 2010 and was able to collect unemployment until Nov, 2012.  The Lord has keep us through all of this.  There was some money in the bank but, that is all but $47.00 worth of gone. I have been scared more than once, waking up in the middle of the night, sweat running off me and asking God to help for the 1000th time.  He has helped and is helping because we are not on the street,  We have food and we are still in our house.
There is no doubt in the minds of either of us that we are in a learning mode for God is teaching us some things about who he is and the lesson we are learning about faith and trust.

I am scared sometimes.  I wonder how we got here and review in my mind all the things we may have done wrong to be where we are.  But, does it mean we did do something wrong? Or are we being tested and tried to see how we hold up under pressure?  I think the latter is true for when I do wrong, I ask to be forgiven. We are in our 50's now and have been given mentor ship over an extraordinary group of  younger people.  So we need the test for the testimony. So as we go through this journey, we are still praying for a steadfast focus on the Lord so we can come out lifting up the name of Jesus.  Praying that we won't be anxious for anything, continue to pray and wait on the Lord.

News Can't Make Me Blue

I am listening to the daily news on TV without watching the faces of those reporting. I know these people have to present the news in an unbiased fashion. I also know it must be hard to act as though what they are saying does not phase them. I don't envy what they have to do to earn their keep. The news is devastating to some degree. Not all of it is bad, but enough so that I know I am blessed and under the aupsices of grace. I know that God has his hands on me, my family and friends. I have all that I need and sometimes, what I want. My health is good and I am taking steps to make it better. I love my husband deeply, and am grateful to God for giving him to me. I have life issues just as everyone else does but, I have the joy of the Lord which is my strength. The daily news may sometimes be frightening, but I serve a risen Savior who knows what is going on and is overseeing the fulfillment of his word in this life. I don't know what I will encounter going forward, but I do know that God has his hands on me and without question that is more than enough for me.

They Left Too Soon

Our family lost 3 important people within a 6 to 8 week period. Each women was a star in our collective life story. We were pained to see them go. Shelia left first. She was my husbands childhood friend. She was a teacher who loved her students and poured her life into theirs. She never married or had children of her own, but gave her students - herself. It evident at her home going service where the church was filled to overflow, that even she meant as much to them as they did to her. Next was my friend of 40 years, Barbara. We got to see one another, talk about old times, how much we would miss each other, the provisions she made for her husband and how much she and I loved one another. I will miss how people were important to her and she made everyone feel welcomed in her presence even when she was so sick and knew she would soon leave us for good. Harriet, was a renaissance women. Harriet was my husband's mom and more then just a mother-in-law to me. She was brilliant about a lot of things, would talk your head off if you listened, and would always let you know how she felt. She was an advocate for others. Three days before her passing, she was in the face of the Director of Nursing about the other residents and what they needed. She was not shy and sometimes put people off by her direct hits on their character or lack thereof. She loved her sons fiercely and Damon, her only grandson was the light of her life. Without question, my life is better for having known and loved them so much. I am sure they have met in Heaven and are awaiting our arrival. I look forward to seeing Jesus and them when it is my time to go. They will never be replaced but always remembered in our hearts.

Tears

There are days like today that I find myself in tears for what seems to be no apparent reason. My soul doth thank the Lord for his goodness and mercy toward me and my family. He is a worthy God. If you know him you can't miss how good he is and how good he has been. I don't have the language to express the depths of my love for him and deep down I know that which I have is still not enough. Thank you Jesus just the same for loving me beyond what I deserve. Looking beyond my faults to seeing my needs. I'll cry until I stop and be grateful for he bottles my tears.

Which Way To Go

I am not always sure which way to go.  I do have, a loving Savior with whom I have a deep and loving relationship and he sets the course for what path I take. It is up to me to
be obedient for it is better than sacrifce. Often when I have chosen to go my own way the outcome has been bad. When I do what I am asked by the Lord, it may not have been what I would have wanted to do , but the outcome is so much better. God's way is so much better.
Many times I have thanked God for not giving me what I asked for. He is far more faithful than I am, and patient with me.
I thank him for his lovingkindness and tender mercy on behalf of someone whose payment for her debt,should have been
hell.

I Am Factor

The I Am factor is very much a part of where my thoughts are.  There have always been people to talk about you get what you say.  Really that has more to do with a mind set and what you are willing to do to have what it is you want.  My I Am factor right now is about right position in my relationship with the Lord.  When my life is aligned with the will of Christ the other aesthetic issues will line up as they should.  God has made promises to us that will be kept beyond what man promises.  We also have to do things in God plan or we find ourselves out of the will of God.  He is the master planner and will execute his desire for us beyond what we think is right for us.